Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Mind Over Matter

I was typing up an update to my NF Challenge Thread and thought I'd post it here too:
RE: Sugar Cravings, I just read Joel's article on said topic! Could not have arrived at a better time.
It reminds that yes, while cravings are inevitable and understandable, there are ways to cope without totally destroying the work you've done. Made me think again that this whole challenge is really you versus yourself. No one is force-feeding you that tub of chocolate icecream (that's what I was craving today, heh). Next time I get that craving, I'm going to go grab some dark chocolate. Yut.
One interesting aspect of this diet/challenge is my relationship with food. I have had various relationships with it. Some really unhealthy, though I was fortunate enough to never develop an actual disorder and endanger my health (I might add that i saw more than a few friends do this, sadly). Because of seeing my friends struggle and harm themselves, I've always sworn to myself to make sure my pursuit of health is just that, a pursuit of HEALTH.
Now, I would be lying if I said that my current regime is totally about health. Yes, I want to be in the Badass Shape of Badasses. But I also want to look amazing naked. There. This is totally about my ego. And that's okay, because it turns out that the path to actually getting in really awesome shape for the first time in my life is down Ego Trail. I want to look good, therefore I have to work out and put good, healthful things into my body. Luckily, I have learned that starving myself and taking ephedrine will just fuck you up, possibly for life.

So, on this whole "Deny your cravings" subject, it's tough, because I want to treat myself well and not feel in a perpetual state of deprivation or denial, because then it seems a slippery slope to anorexia, body dysmorphia, etc (for me, not everyone). I'm just super aware of it, I guess. Anyhow, I figure the main way to avoid this is focus on treating my body with love and attention, as well as setting more goals.
A) LOADING UP on protein etc during the day. I upped my egg intake to 4 this morning and felt great all morning. So guess what? Four eggs it is!
B) Figuring out more yummy ways to cook. I have been pretty lazy with this, and cooking the same shit over and over again, because I'm too lazy to do anything differently than throw it in a pan and sautee it with olive oil. I just need more variety.

C)I've discovered that I am really enjoying the feeling of doing difficult shit. When I complete a longer set or go another day with no sugar, it's kind of like proof that it really, truly is mind over matter. I think the root of this entire experiment is Control. This whole thing is something that is under MY control. No one else has any influence of any kind. The outcome is truly up to me, and me alone. And that is pretty damn empowering.

That's pretty much it.  Obviously, the eating guidelines I follow are tough when you realize how saturated with processed sugar and crap our food is.   When you think about how much sugar and god-knows-what-else is in our food, it's really no wonder people get sick so much and suffer so many health problems.  I would be very interested to see a long term study on people who eat strict paleo etc and what their health looks like in the long run.  I know it would be really hard to pull off and control for different factors, but you know.  ANYWAY.

When it comes down to it for me, this is about control.  This is about being utterly and totally responsible for and to myself.  No one else can force me to eat crap, no one can trick me into giving up or thinking "it's just too hard."  I believe in the power of the human mind to Get. Shit. Ton. And this is the ultimate test of that for me.  How badly do I want this? How much do I want to prove that I can do WHATEVER I set my mind to?

The answer? Very.

And I mean to.

On that note, time to dick around on tumblr and watch some Supernatural.


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